2006-07 Winning Essays

The following essays were written by the statewide essayists of Connecticut's 2006-2007 Laws of Life Essay Writing Program. 

The Gift of Giving

I always thought it was better to receive than to give, but when my family went to donate clothes and other items to the homeless shelter, I realized that it’s better to give than to receive. One year ago we went to the homeless shelter in Norwich and donated toys and clothes. It was my birthday and my parents wanted me to donate all of the clothing that I had outgrown as well as toys I no longer played with. I didn’t really mind because the new toys I got for my birthday were better, especially one in particular.

My favorite gift was the Lego Star War Figurine. I really enjoy building Legos, but my mom didn’t want me to start building it while we were in the car because she was worried I’d loose the pieces in the seats. I liked just looking at the box anyway, seeing the clone trooper on great, big, gray walker. It was a challenge not to open the box, but I was able to resist. However, I could picture myself at home building the walker and then finishing and marching around with the clone-riding walker pretending to slay the enemy.

We finally got to the homeless shelter and it was a very sad sight to see. It was kind of dark and gloomy and at first I didn’t even see the people inside. However, when we went further inside, I saw some kids and adults moping around the dark room with frowns on their faces and nothing to do. The sight of their faces was saddening to me and made me feel very pitiful and then I decided to do something I thought I’d never do. I took hold of my Lego set and dropped it right into the donation bin. After I did that, my sadness turned into pride raising my spirits ten fold. I felt like a good and generous kid in this dark place. I felt like I was the sun shining on a bright summer day.

I’ll never forget the feeling of donating my toy to someone who needed it more than I did. As much as I wanted that Lego trooper, his command was needed elsewhere to make some other kid happy. Even though I would have liked to keep the toy, a boy or girl at a homeless shelter would enjoy it five times more than I would. Even of if I got another one, I still would donate it for the better cause and let another kid enjoy it because I already have what I need. I will keep donating things because it’s better to give than receive. No law of life is more important in my life than the gift of giving.

Hope

Hope: a law that can pertain to everyone, no matter his or her race, religion, or place in society. It can be stronger in war than any army, and harder to break than the bond of a young boy and his dog. An example of a person holding this strong hope is Anne Frank.

In the year 1942, thirteen-year-old Anne Frank and her family were forced to go into hiding to escape the Nazi deportations during World War II. The Frank family was Jewish and just for that, they were in grave danger due to Adolf Hitler’s plan to “exterminate” the Jews. Anne’s father planned to hide him and his family in a secluded area of his office building, along with four other people. The place was called Secret Annex. During the time they stayed there, Anne kept a diary and wrote about the events, people, and her feelings about being in hiding. Though some days were frustrating, joyous, or ordinary, she continued to write. She hoped to someday publish her diary and become a famous writer or reporter. At the time, Anne didn’t have the faintest idea that her diary would change the world. After hiding in the Annex for almost two years, the eight occupants were discovered. They were arrested by SS police and deported to termination camps. Anne’s diary was found scattered on the floor by people who helped her family hide. Anne’s father, Otto, wad the only one of the eight of survive the war. He was given Anne’s diary and followed her wished to publish it. To this day, many people around the world read the story of Anne Frank. She helped the world understand what was happening during World War II, and what it was like through a child’s eyes. Though she was seen just as a young Jewish girl, she still wanted to pursue her dreams even in times of fear. Anne Frank had hope.

Another example of strong hope is the people of New Orleans. After Hurricane Katrina in 2005, thousands of people were displaced, the city of New Orleans being the worst. On television, I would hear people who were waiting to get into shelters, or getting ice and water saying this: “We can’t give up hope because it is all we have left.” That sentence of just a few short words has remained in my mind since the first time I heard it. Many of the stranded people said they would stay and rebuild. A year and five month later, New Orleans is slowly but surely coming back to be the great city, a city that will be filled with Jazz and the excitement of Mardi Gras in the air just like it used to be.

These are two different examples, but they are bound by one purpose. To me, hope is the will and power to not give up and believe that everything will be just. I have read the story of Anne Frank, and I am now one who is able to understand the difficulties of war as a child back in the 1940’s. I, like Anne, too know what it is like, being twelve and living in a time of war. My father works on a submarine making the war more personal for my family and myself. Sometimes it isn’t easy, but if there is still hope, there is a chance things will get better. After Katrina, communities pulled together and started food and clothing drives to assist the distressed areas. To me that was like saying “We are going to help and make things better. Don’t loose hope now.” To me, hope is worth more than money or any materialistic item. It is something that can grow bigger and bigger, and nobody can take it away without a fight. If there Is still hope, there will always be a chance things can get better – no matter what.

It’s Cool To Be Kind

From an early age, I have always cared about people. I just had to help them if they needed it. Being kind doesn’t just help the person receiving kindness; it benefits the person giving it, too. Kindness is like kindling; it only needs a spark to get it going. And once it is burning, it spreads and spreads. And that fire gives off warmth throughout the community.

Kindness doesn’t only benefit the person receiving it, it helps the person who gives it. There is a sense of satisfaction that comes from helping another person. Once when I was younger, we were having snack time and a kid was sitting alone who looked very sad. I decided to ask him to sit with my friends and me even though my other friends didn’t want him to. It gave me this warm feeling and I like how he smiled when I invited him over. I took this outlook of kindness with me to Eastern Middle School. Last year, as a member of the student council, I had the idea to try to take away the school rule of only six students at a table because this was making some kids have to sit alone. It made me sad to see them sitting there alone and I wanted help. I have learned that kindness doesn’t only benefit the giver and receiver; it creates an effect, a trickle effect.

Being kind creates a trickle effect, which simply means when you are kind; it makes other people want to be kind, too. A good example of the trickle effect is when I was a friend to a boy in my school who other kid thought was weird. He was the kind of person who was always acting tough with everyone. After we became friends, he started to relax and become less hostile. He then began to be more friendly to people. After a few days, he was a friend to someone else, like I was to him. The kids who once thought he was weird didn’t perceive him as a “loser” anymore. This is an example of the trickle effect. It only takes one person to ignite this chain reaction. As Jesse Jackson once said, “Never look down on someone unless you are helping them up.”

Kindness doesn’t only create a trickle effect; it creates a sense of caring throughout your community or school. Last year, after hearing about Hurricane Katrina on the news, I felt very sad and I knew I needed to help; I just didn’t know how. I told my mom how I was feeling and she told me that the best way to help is to give your time. She told me the first meeting of the Young Volunteers was the very next day. I knew I needed to join this club and help people in need. Young Volunteers help by raising money for charities. After our first bake sale, there seemed to be a good feeling in the air. It made everyone feel like they had helped raise money for people in need. The sense of kindness grew throughout the year as we did more fundraisers. Everyone seemed more and more willing to help as the year went on. I even recruited several of my friends to join the club who initially though it was not a cool thing to do. But they realized what I already knew; its cool to be kind.

As the Dali Lama said, “If you want others to be happy, practice compassion.” These are the words I live my life by. There are words everyone should live by and if they did, the world would be a kinder place.

An Unexpected Diagnosis

As I sat I the orthodontist’s chair, I wondered whether I would get braces or if I was going to live the rest of my life with spaced out teeth.

When Dr. Berger, my new orthodontist, entered the exam room to chat, I figured that she was just trying to learn a little about my personality and me. I found it coincidental that she has two girls, one in 7th grade and one in 8th grade like my sister and me. Like me, her daughter takes algebra in he middle school.

We discussed how I was struggling in algebra class and Dr. Berger also explained how her daughter also struggles with algebraic methods. She stopped me while I was explaining to her why I was having such a hard time. “No one has to be brilliant to do well and be successful. You only have to put time, effort, and commitment into your studies,” she explained.

I though about Dr. Berger’s advice during math class the next day: I didn’t have to be perfect! I just had to push myself to reach my goal, which was to achieve my personal best. I started using her words of wisdom as motivation from that very second.

Ever since then I have been pushing myself to do better. I have become a better student by studying extra hard and paying closer attention. I used to think that I was “enough.” So I somewhat ignored what the teachers were teaching. It wasn’t that I didn’t want to learn or pay attention. It was just that I didn’t apply 100% of my effort into studies.

Similarly, I have applied this philosophy to other aspects of my life. In social situations, I push myself to meet new people or talk to people who I wouldn’t normally socialize with. To my delight, I have mad new friends because I made the effort to get to know them. I also started accepting people for who they are. In middle school, there are so many different cliques. When I really began to closely analyze my behaviors, I realized I was just prejudiced against some of them just because of differences in clothing styles or beliefs. By getting to know all types of people, I learned that deep down inside, people are more alike than others.

I don’t want to have many regrets, so I have been pushing myself to try new things, meet new people, and attempt to always work to my fullest potential. The next time I see my orthodontist, I will thank her for her advice. I entered her office with the expectation of improving my smile and I left with advice that changed my life.

Hoping for the Best

A few months ago something happened to me. It has taught me to never give up, and to never stop believing.

In May I found out that my mom might have lung cancer. When my dad told me that one day after school I was a wreck. I could not stop crying. I was mad at her for smoking. I was so mad that I went to her purse, took out her cigarettes, ripped them up, and threw them out. I kept asking myself, why her? How could God do this to us? So many questions went through my head that I would stare for minutes. One thought that still bothers me is my nine- month-old sister and if she will ever remember my mother if she were to die young. We were still waiting for the results of the test, but right then I believed the worst.

In May 2006, my mother was diagnosed with stage III-A lung cancer. I found out because one day before I went to my friend’s house for a get-together, the phone rang and it was the doctor. I listened in as my dad spoke to him and the doctor said the results were positive for cancer. During the car ride I tried not to cry. I did not want my dad to know I listened in on the conversation. My dad during the car ride looked as if there was something on his mind, which I figured was my mom. When I got to my friend’s house, I started to cry on my best friend Sam’s shoulder. No one else knew about my mom except for her and my other good friend Carley. My friend Kim took me into her hallway and asked me what was wrong, so I told her. I was fine after I got it all out. When I got home, my dad told my mom the bad news. She didn’t cry or anything. It was as if she knew when she took the test that she had it. My dad then told me to never stop believing and to never give up. After that, I knew that I had to believe in order to move on.

Next, something that was a little bit hard for me was dealing with school. During the day, my eyes would start to water just thinking about it. In fact, sometimes now, when teachers talk about how your mom will be there to help you when you are older, my eyes will start to water because I think there is a chance that my mom might not even be there for my little sister’s kindergarten graduation. That just tears me up inside thinking about that. When I told my Spanish teacher about my mom she told me to go to guidance, so I did. I cried because it was hard to talk about. Now it is like all the teachers know about it, and they are always asking me, “How is your mom?” and, “How are you?” It doesn’t bother me. It’s just weird explaining it over and over again. School can be quite tough at times.

When my mom started chemo and radiation, she began to feel very nauseous and tired all the time. She would come home early because she felt nauseated. She had decided to cut her hair short because the doctor said she would lose her hair, so she wanted to get used to it being short. I was with her when she got it cut. At first, I thought it would look bad, but she came out looking better and younger. The whole family agreed. As chemo and radiation went on, none of her hair fell, although it’s not surprising. My mom and I both have very thick hair from my great grandma. She still thought her hair was going to fall. It didn’t. Chemo and radiation were over, and she had a full head of hair!

My mom is still waiting for surgery. I believe she will make it through, cancer free, and live to be old so she can go to New Zealand because she wants to go there, and most importantly give my brother, my sister and me the advice to get us through life. I can’t live without her, so I KNOW she will be ok. I know through my mom to never stop believing. I haven’t given up hope, and when she goes into surgery I will be there for her every step of the way.

Colored Pencils and Lined Paper

Our Happiness is not determined by what others have, but rather by what we possess.

The heat of the Amazon jungle had to become unbearable. I was now aware of the increasing amount of sweat making its way down my back, and for that matter, my whole body. As I knelt down to give a little girl, no older than six, a backpack that was filled with the necessary tools to learn, I thought about the journey I took just to deliver these school supplies to these children. All around me their smiles filled the basic concrete schoolhouse with joy like I had never seen before. Some of the children were older than me, and yet I was making a day in their day and their life a little brighter. The children were laughing and enjoying themselves, and their mothers were handing my family fruit and blessing us. How could all this be because my family performed a simple act of kindness? How could colored pencils and lined paper make one person, one child so happy?

I learned many lessons from those children that day. Among these lessons, that our happiness is not determined by what others have, but rather by what we possess. There are so many things we as Americans take for granted. All around the world there are millions of people living in unimaginable conditions while we enjoy our televisions and toilets. We employ less fortunate people do our dirty work, and the we reap the benefits. The poorest Americans will never be as poor as the richest Somali. While these children were rich compared to other countries, by our standards they were living in poverty. While any American would not have enjoyed our gifts of pencils and crayons, these children cradled them as though nothing else in the world mattered. Their happiness and appreciation was based on what little they owned, and what little they got.

I got a tiny taste of what their life was like during the duration of my stay in the Amazon jungle. At our lodge, there was no electricity and the toilets were made of a simple toilet and washbasin. Our clothes were washed in the same river that the fish swam in. Surprisingly, you couldn’t tell that our clothes had been rinsed in a muddy river and hung from lines to dry, as opposed to the washer and dryer I was so accustomed to at home. Also, in our jungle lodge, cold beverages were a treat, and you were only allowed one a day. This was because ice was a precious resource that had to be brought in from Iquitos, the nearby city. Living without these supposed necessities, such as electricity and ice, it wasn’t as hard as it might have seemed. After a couple of days, I could hardly remember what it was like to have a constant flow of air conditioning. When I returned home, an ice-cold glass of Coke seemed like a treat, when just two weeks ago it was readily accessible to me.

Because of that trip I changed. I began to appreciate what I had, and no longer marveled at what others owned that I did not. Everyday, I reminded myself of those children’s smiles, and how happy they were just to receive the most simple of things. I learned to practice my own way of life, that our happiness is not determined by what others have, but rather by what we possess.

You. Me. Everyone. We all envy other people; let them be our co-workers, classmates, and next0door neighbors. We envy them for their looks, their possessions, their jobs and many other silly things. Everyone knows the saying, the grass is always greener on the other side, and many of us have tome to believe this American proverb to be true. We are a competitive world; there is no doubt about that. But sometimes, we have to take a step back and appreciate what we have. We shouldn’t let other people’s good fortune bother us. We should be happy with what we have and what we get …. because you could be that six-year old girl in the Amazon rainforest who smiles when she gets colored pencils and lined paper.

Dreams

“Hold fast to dreams, for if dreams die, life is a broken winged bird that cannot fly.” This line is from my favorite poem Dreams by Langston Hughes. This poem holds a special meaning because it reminds me of my law of life. My law of life is to never give up. I have been taught this by my father’s life story.

My father was born a village boy in Changle, Fuchow, in the providence of Fujian, in China. He went to school in the day, and in the afternoon worked in the fields. He worked till sunset, and did homework till late hours. Life was hard with a big family, and the financial problems due to the economy. He was a teen when he heard of America. People described America as the land where all dreams come true, the land of gold, a land where the homeless can become millionaires.

At the young age of 15, my father left China, and came to America. “I thought it was too good to be truth coming to America, but when I arrived, I realized what people had said about America being the land of gold was false.” The biggest problem was the language barrier. People refused to hire my father because he did not speak English. Even when he did, it was minimal. My father ended up working with his uncle in a tiny restaurant. “For the first few years life was tough, I worked from 10 in the morning until 11 at night, I delivered food, cleaned and cooked. At the time the apartment that I lived in was small with absolutely no entertainment. I wanted to go to school. I wanted to learn English, but it was impossible because I had a debt.”

Despite these obstacles my father continued working hard, now he has reached his goal, his American dream.

This is what I learned from my father; never give up. He started out as a poor village boy with absolutely nothing and became the man he is today. Even though we are not rich my father always provides the best for my brother and me. Without his struggling and determination, I would not be in America, would not have an education, and would not have the luxury I have today. I thank him for that, and the most important life lesson he has tough me. He often says, “Teresa, if you want something you have to work for it, things don’t come easily in life. Reality is harsh, obstacles everywhere, but if you truly, truly want something you cannot ever give up.”

Freedom of Education

“Only the educated are free.” ~ Epictetus

What is freedom? According to Oxford American Dictionaries, it is “the power or right to act, speak, or think as one wants without hindrance or restraint.” While I agree with this denotation, to me, freedom holds only one concept: the ability to be your natural self and control your own actions and mind. An attribute associated with freedom is the opportunity to receive a valuable education. Throughout history, the greatest people were the ones who strived for an abundant education. My law of life is to be grateful for the freedoms we have, especially education. As Frederick Douglass stated, “Education … means emancipation. It means the light and liberty. It means the uplifting of the soul of man [humans] into the glorious light of truth, the light by which men [people] can only be made free.”

America promises (or at least in the minds of immigrants) that everyone will receive “liberty” upon arrival, and this myth ignites a small flame of hope -- bound to be extinguished in some people -- as they set foot on American soil. It is a belief around the world that America is the land of opportunity where you have freedom, a privilege absent in other nations. The poem, “Let America be America Again,” by Langston Hughes, mentions this when it states, “Let it be the pioneer on the plain, seeking a home where he himself is free.” This signifies that America has migrated away from this image with the renewal of generations. Some young people today don’t appreciate this right -- or even take advantage of an education -- and are passive, accepting a future that only promises failure for them.

Over 200 years ago, Blacks were forced from their homes in Africa to the alien lands of America as slaves (unlike early immigrants who craved the opportunity to be here) and lost their cherished freedom for centuries. Mama, a main character in, A Raisin in the Sun, by Lorraine Hansberry, refers to this when she realizes that in the modern generation she was living amongst, “Money is life. [But] Once upon a time [back in her day] freedom used to be life -- now it’s money.” (p. 61) Freedom was a privilege that was always out of reach for slaves and black people, yet remained what they desired most. Many risked their lives trying to grasp that opportunity -- as slaves running away from plantations or as advocates of Civil Rights fighting for equality. It was a gift so powerful that parents instilled the passion for independence in their children, fueling them to carry on the legacy and provide this inestimable endowment for their children. When you compare the defiance our forefathers had toward slavery to the souls of some children today -- and their apathetic attitudes toward learning -- many would be significantly and understandably ashamed.

I’m thankful for my freedom, because it comes from the sacrifices of my ancestors. I am respectful of my elders because, without them, I would not be here today. I appreciate many blessings my forefathers granted me. The opportunity to receive an education is a freedom that took a horde of suffering for them to accomplish. Being a person who likes to express myself (usually through writing), I would be utterly miserable without the right of speech and education, because this is freedom to me. Not only do I like to write and speak, I love to read at any time of the day. Some call me a bookworm; you can find me in any corner with my nose in a book, and I won’t come out for hours on end. My ancestors were denied the right to gain an education -- even learning to read and write was considered a crime for slaves – and, for that, I mourn them. Some people, often abolitionists, acknowledged that denying people their right to an education was savage treatment toward a human and tried to help them. If it was discovered that a slave was being taught to read and write, that slave was severely beaten, because masters constantly tried to degrade their “property” to the point where they were considered inhuman. These same masters realized that if a slaved possessed an education, he or she also possessed an open mind to resist oppression. This is why I strive to achieve the best education, I can.

I strive to evolve into an accomplished young black woman, via education, who can pass my knowledge on to others. My whole life I’ve worked at becoming this great woman, and my accomplishments continuously accumulate. I have maintained an A/B average, and I stay active in the school. For instance, I am the Athletic Chair for the Student Council, and I play basketball and run track. I also assist teachers with errands, too, like when a teacher needed me to retrieve a “problematic student” from the hallway, I successfully completed the task. I even received a Best Effort award last year from my English teacher. It is important for me to be a role model, just as a number of people have been for me. In addition to my mother, I draw encouragement from many famous figures.

From Mary Jane McLeod Bethune and W.E.B. Dubois to Alan Keyes and Condoleezza Rice, African Americans have been making a mark throughout history in education. Mary Jane McLeod Bethune founded her own college, later known as Bethune-Cookman College for African Americans, in Daytona, Florida. This prominent college was originally founded as the Daytona Educational and Industrial Training School for Negro Girls in 1904. In 1923, it merged with the Cookman Institute of Jacksonville, Florida and became a co-ed high school. A year later, in 1924, it became affiliated with the Methodist church. By 1931, it had become a junior college, and took on its present name of Bethune-Cookman College. Though the location had undergone many changes, its primary goal remained the education of Black people. W.E.B. Dubois (1868-1963) in 1895 was the first African American to receive a Ph.D. from Harvard University (I aspire to achieve the same degree there). This man devoted most of his life to research on slavery and has achieved a copious amount of data in the subject. It takes a deep dedication to allocate your future on learning about the past, and this is what Dubois did, for which I strongly admire him. Alan Keyes is an educated Black man who also received his Ph.D. from Harvard. He is a Republican public speaker and former diplomat. He ran for U.S. President two times and for the U.S. Senate three times. This man has achieved a high mark in government and society, which was primarily due to his education. Condoleezza Rice is an African American woman who was a professor at Yale University, and now she holds the position of U.S. Secretary of State. She is an extremely successful woman. These are people who value education, and they inspire me to do the same.

The freedom to receive an education is a privilege that shouldn’t be handled lightly, which is why it is my law of life. Slaves sacrificed the little dignity they had for this freedom, so that all people could appreciate it now, in current times. Today’s youth should be ashamed if they don’t realize this and learn from it. I refer to those adolescents who are so trapped in the crime and calamity on the streets that they seem to not be able to pull themselves out of it, as well as those who sit in classrooms and don’t pay attention to the lesson taught or try their hardest on each assignment.

“Education makes people easy to lead, but difficult to drive, easy to govern, but impossible to enslave.” (Henry Peter Broughan) If we, as a nation, do not urge our children to pursue an education, later generations may fall back into the evil hands of slavery, for cultivation of knowledge is the most influential law of life, the key to freedom.

Works Cited:
(For my sixth paragraph about famous African Americans)

• http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bethune-Cookman_College
• http://www.renewamerica.us/keyes/whois.htm
• http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Alan_Keyes

A Learning Curve

A curve has opened my eyes to some of the difficult realities of life. While most people would feel very unfortunate to have to spend extended time in a children’s hospital, I actually feel fortunate to have had this experience. Watching children overcome their extreme physical and medical obstacles in life has had a major impact on me. The diagnosis of scoliosis has become a “learning curve” I have had to overcome in my life.

It all started at the age of 10 when I went for a routine physical. My pediatrician noticed that my posture had changed and my back looked a bit different. She measured the curvature of my spine and said it was not a normal reading. She said I should visit the Connecticut Children’s Medical Center (CCMC) Orthopedic Department for further examination. After about 10 x-rays and multiple examinations, my parents and I were told that it appeared that I had advanced scoliosis. At that time my biggest question was, “What is scoliosis and how is it going to affect my life?” I was very scared and wondered why I had to live with this. The prognosis was that, because I still had a lot of growing to do, I would need to be monitored frequently and closely over the next few years. If my curvature got any worse I would need to be placed in a full body brace that I would have to wear all day. The doctors told me I would become very familiar with them and the hospital since I would be spending a lot of time there. I felt very sorry for myself. Over the course of the year, I had many visits to CCMC. As I sat in the X-ray Department awaiting my turn, I had slowly began to notice that I was surrounded by other kids, some that looked like me and others who were obviously very sick. As I further observed the children with no hair, bandages, and scars I began to realize that maybe my condition was not really as bad as I had thought. My condition, at times, appeared to get better but at other times the doctors said the curvature was the same or even a little worse. Recently, I was told that my condition has actually progressed to the point that it was now recommended that I wear a night brace. If it wasn’t for the experiences of observing the children so much worse off then me, I would have taken this news very badly.

My experiences at the hospital have included seeing many disturbing sights pass right before my very eyes. Such as, little children in wheelchairs, their legs so frail, it is obvious they will never walk for a very long time or if ever. I have seen children whisked away on stretchers, heading toward the operating room about to undergo major surgeries. Many times as I awaited my name to be called, I had the opportunity to talk and play with some of these children. They may have looked different but I quickly learned that they were just like everyone else. At times, I even began to think I was the one that looked different from everyone else in the hospital. Some of the kids were very open and willing to talk to me about their conditions. I was amazed at how some were able to talk about the horrible things they have to endure with such ease and calmness. Here I was freaking out about a curved spine, x-rays, and possibly wearing a brace. In the beginning, I was worried this condition was going to have a real impact on my life, indeed it has, but in a good way.

There are many things I have learned from my visits to CCMC that will always have a major influence on my laws of life. One of the laws I learned was that we should all appreciate the life we were given and who we are. The children I met at CCMC never thought their conditions were a burden. They accepted who they were and what their limitations were. I never once heard one of them complain and ask why they have to live with what they had. I know my back is curved and my shoulders may be uneven, but I also know that is what makes me the person I am and there is nothing wrong with that. Throughout my time at CCMC I received, what I would consider, bad news about my own condition. I also saw children and their parents given news even more devastating. This is when they demonstrated courage which has become another important law of life to me. These families were obviously upset with what they were just told, but they looked at it as just another challenge that they will have to face. These children never gave up their hope of getting better. Through this, I learned how important it is to be courageous and positive in life. The last major observation I made caused me to think about life in general. From my perspective, these children didn’t really have a life outside the hospital. In reality, however, they appreciated life and all of its small wonders so much more than I did. They were living their lives to the fullest and appreciated every minute at a time. Their calendars weren’t filled with sporting events or parties, but I soon realized they were having more fun than I was just by appreciating a new day. These children were very inspiring to me and quickly changed the way I view life in so many ways.

Who would have known that a simple curve in my spine would cause me to learn so much? The children at the Connecticut Children’s Medical Center have taught me a whole lot in the past few years that I have spent visiting the hospital. They taught me to have courage and strength, appreciate who you are, to live life to the fullest, and many more laws to go by in life. I am very thankful for being diagnosed with scoliosis because if I wasn’t, I wouldn’t have had such a life changing experience.

The Laws of Forgiveness

Every day, people make careless mistakes. They make mistakes without realizing how these choices will affect others. One poor move shattered my life on May 2, 2004. My mother took her own life by overdosing on drugs.

My eyes peeled open, absorbing the darkness of my bedroom. I glanced at my clock, which read 12:42 a.m. Usually, I never woke up during the night, and after I unsuccessfully tried to fall back asleep, I sensed a problem. I rolled out of my bed and stumbled down the hallway to my parents’ room. As the door opened, my stomach lurched. There was a thick, foul stench of vodka. As I made my way to the bed, I began to call my mom’s name. When I spied her body, lying motionless in the bed, I violently began to shake her. After a minute, I turned the light on. When I looked at her pale face, I noticed her plum lips. Fear flooded my body, and I darted to the guest bedroom, where my dad had been sleeping. I shook him aggressively, and whispered, “Mom’s not breathing.”

Those chaotic events will remain in my memory forever. The remainder of the night was a blur, filled with tears, prayers, and tragedy. After the loss of my mom, I realized that a vital law of life is forgiveness. You need to forgive people for their mistakes and differences. Without letting these imperfections go, our world would be filled with hatred and judgment. As I slowly began to understand this law of life, I started to forgive my mother and her painful choices with alcohol and drugs. I realized how unhappy she had been and, without thinking, she viewed death as the only way to escape her misery. In life, forgiveness is vital, and no matter what the situation is, nothing should stop you from forgiving the individual who made the mistake. I knew my mom was filled with sorrow, but I never realized she would have done something as extreme as this. Although it came as a huge shock to our family, we all knew my mom’s depression would capture her mind sooner or later. I have learned that to go on in life, I need to forgive my mother. Although I would have appreciated a normal childhood, with a mom who showed up at the scheduled time to birthday parties or was able to cook my favorite meal, I needed to have empathy for her issues.

Having a selfish view on this situation does not help with forgiving. During those years when my mom had her substance abuse problems, I decided to put my needs aside and assist her with everyday tasks, such as scheduling appointments or cleaning the house. When I arrived home from school, I switched from daughter role to mother role, helping my younger sister with her homework or ordering pizzas for dinner. It did not bother me that I was eight years old and actually playing a real-life game of “house.” When my mom’s situation became clear to me, I immediately felt responsible for my sister and the household. Every afternoon, when I carefully placed the empty wine bottles in the closet to hide from the family, I watched my mom lay lifeless on the mattress. I felt so badly for her, and I knew she had no control over her problems. I was never mad at my mother about her dilemma.

One person who always understood the meaning of forgiveness was my father. He was infuriated and sympathetic for my mother at the same time. He watched her struggle for years, but he never left her side. My dad knew that it was not my mom’s fault for her issues. He remembered her broken childhood and the depression she had battled during her pregnancies with my sister and me. Because of her problems, my dad realized that he could either leave her to deal with her own troubles, or help her fight through it. Because he was a forgiving individual, my dad stayed with my mother until the end, and although he was unbelievably angry with her mistakes, he forgave her because he knew my mom couldn’t control herself. I admire my father and his loving character. I knew that forgiving my mom was the right thing to do, and I was proud that my dad could set aside all of the chaos she had caused and express his empathy for her. I decided to follow my father’s footsteps and learn to forgive other individuals, like my friends. An example of this was when my good friend continuously gossiped about me during school. I confronted her, and she rudely denied the accusation, even though we both knew it was true. Her chatter continued, and I realized she had a troubled life, and talking about others was something she did daily, to help eliminate her problems occurring at home. When I figured out that her live was filled with issues, I became empathetic for her, and I understood why she blabbed about numerous kids. With my dad’s example teaching me how to forgive, I have become a well-rounded, understanding individual.

Forgiveness is a critical element in the world. Every second of every minute of every day, someone makes a mistake that can affect one individual or an entire country. I understood why forgiveness was so important when I discovered this moving quote- “If we practice and eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth, soon the whole world will be blind and toothless.”- Mahatma Gandhi. This quote expressed the true meaning of forgiveness. Leaders of towns, cities, and countries make daily choices that determine their land’s future. Everyday families are torn apart because of alcohol and drugs, like mine. In life, you have to forgive others for their mistakes. They may or may not realize that they are even making a bad decision. It is important to understand that humans make poor choices daily. Without forgiveness, our world would be crammed with individuals who are overwhelmed with hatred and anger.

After years of watching my mother struggle, I made a promise to myself to take control over my problems and be the boss of my own life. I have forgiven her for the trouble she caused over the years. Forgiveness has given me the ability to feel empathy for those who are causing a dilemma with their abuse issues. I have become more caring and sympathetic, which are two vital traits to me, personally. I have observed the mistakes my mom made, and when I grow older and eventually become a mother, I will try my best to avoid the faults she made.

When my mom peacefully died that warm May night, I was heartbroken, yet I knew her grieving soul was free. Even though I was troubled by her problems, and I wished for a stable childhood, I wanted to forgive her. She was my mother, who had brought me into this world, nurtured me and loved me no matter what, and aside from her situation, and instead of hating her for her differences, I realized that she was my mom, and I had admired her so much, and living my life while hating her would be the most painful thing to do, so I forgave her for this dilemma, and, to this day, love and respect her, regardless of her mistakes.

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